ONE MONTH TO WORLDS!!!

In one month I will be standing on the shore of Lake Las Vegas with some of the greatest 70.3 athletes in the world.  Up until about a week ago I was not excited for it, I didn’t feel prepared.  But the excitement recently kicked in.  I have no idea what to expect.  I try to always follow the rule to only race myself, train smart and race smart and you’ll succeed.    

I am excited and am I nervous.  Most of all, I don’t have any clue how I am going to get through an entire Half Ironman without all my racing buddies!  My Ironman bike time was around 6:30 and, in my mind, it flew by.  Why, you ask?  Because the ENTIRE TIME I was watching the course for the other 11 people I trained with.  I am so excited to go, but at the same time I will miss having everyone I train with out there with me.  The motivation and happiness that resounds when I see someone I train with on the course will be empty and for that I am sad.

So how did I get here?  It all starts in the city where Vegas goes to die (is that harsh???)  Branson, MO. 

The bike portion of Branson kicked my butt.  Bad.  When I knew T2 was close though, my spirits lifted.  The bike leg hadn’t been what I hoped for but, my legs felt good and I was confident of my run.  We were on a narrow path and I said to the guy in front of me “we’re almost home free”.  Damn karma!!!  I should have kept my mouth shut.  I had seen more flats during Branson then I had seen the entire year during training and racing (this really is not an over exaggeration, ask anyone that raced at Branson). 

Not two seconds later my tire flatted.  AHHHHHHHH!!!  Seriously???  Was that mine?!?  I jumped off my bike, looked at the huge slash in my tire (had a gnome jumped out and slashed it with a switch blade???  How in the world do you get a slash like that in your tire?).  I knew I was about a mile out and so I did what any sane triathlete with the goal of qualifying for Worlds would do (and the triathlete that knows they’re not strong enough to tear their tubular off the bike in less than an hour).  I took of my bike shoes and I began to run in.  Tamara and Jack both passed me and asked what I was doing.  I verified with Tamara that we were about a mile out and I just kept running.  I came out of the park to see Jack had turned around to help me.  I couldn’t believe it.  He had sacrificed his race for me because he knew what my goal was.  I was almost in tears running my bike in because I had been so ready to start the run and I thought for sure my chance to qualify was gone.  Then I saw Jack.  Although he tried to help, I showed him that the tire was too far gone and told him to go ahead.  Jack stopping to help is what got me through running my bike in and to the run.  Apparently, my running my bike in is what got him to the run. 

The run portion of Branson was a joke.  It was pouring down rain, Heather saw ducks on the run course (not a joke…), transition probably could have been designated a national disaster zone due to flooding, yet everyone kept running.  I ran much of the run with Jack (I say I did this because he’s taller and, thus, the lightning would strike him, but really it’s much more enjoyable to run with someone).  We ran much of the run faster than I cared to run, but Jack was running fast, so I ran fast.  At some point I told him he could go ahead because I couldn’t hold the pace and he said something along the lines of “thank God, I was just running fast because you were.”  This is what I will miss at Worlds!

I finished Branson in 7^th place.  Two slots were allocated to my age group, so I had to wait for roll down.  When they called my name I nearly tackled Heather and I couldn’t wipe the grin off of my face.  I’m a stickler for earning things though.  So, I plan to be at Worlds again, some day, by taking one of the top spots in my age group.  But for now, I can’t wait for September 6^th, when I’ll be in Las Vegas scouting out the course.  I am so thankful for my parents, cousin Karen, Tim, Monica, and Jen Lee for coming out to support me.  Although triathlon is an individual sport, I don’t view it that way.  This will be the first time I’m truly racing alone and I’m more worried about that than actually completing the race!  

Critter Tales and Furry Fears

I run and ride along Bellaire Drive a lot as it’s a straight shot out to Benbrook.  I see many critters on my training adventures.  Dogs , squirrels, some snakes, armadillos (usually they’re road kill), deer, and road runners just to name a few.

Most are totally innocent and never threaten me.  Most.

Squirrels are tricky though.  Let me tell you, those suckers can turn on a dime!  Although I am not afraid of squirrels, they have, on more than one occasion, tried to make me crash on my bike by freezing - - - turning to scamper off away from me, making me believe I may proceed with no fear of death - - - then FOR NO APPARENT OR RELEVANT REASON - - - running right in front of me, leading to my imminent death. 

There was a snake one day, too.  I was doing repeats on Bellaire and I rode by this poor snake (when they are dead I feel sorry for them and my fear of the ferocious beasts wanes) who had been run over by, what looked like, a bike tire.  I rode by it, very close so as to stay in the bike lane.  It was partially laid out and looked very much dead.  I finished my out and back and headed out again.  I made note to ride closer to the curb as I came upon the “dead” snake again.  The snake was very much NOT dead at this point and was coiled up.  CRAP!  My heart jumped. 

Ok, it was not this small, but I probably overreacted

For those of you that did the Trident Sports open water swim on July 21^st, you heard about the strange fish phenomenon.  Tim and I were out setting buoys on Friday night and we came upon an area of the lake where Tim told me “water was bubbling up, probably from a pipe under the lake.”  For a moment I believed him.  As I sat in my kayak looking at the bubbling water (that was a good four feet wide), I realized this “pipe” was moving.  I screamed.  No, I take that back, I squealed.  Not in joy, in pure fear.  This was straight out of a horror movie, no joke. 

As I watched it, I am not sure if I was frozen in fear or pure curiosity, but I sat and starred at it, little tiny fish started flopping out all over the place.  It was like a moving lake crop circle.  FREAKED.ME.OUT.

Deer are an elegant creature.  They are truly graceful and, on occasion, I am fortunate to see one or two deer on my rides through Benbrook.  I often lose my focus as I ride by and just watch them.  However, I have this absolutely strange fear of being rammed, entirely by accident, by a deer.  My friend Larson showed me a video of a guy getting rammed by a deer and I now have this bizarre fear of getting t-boned as I’m riding through Benbrook.  I’m truly afraid that the doe is setting me up.  Gracefully meandering into the road to catch my attention and then BAM, the buck gets me (yes, this is a true fear).   If they’re just grazing by the side of the road, I’m totally cool with that.  But if one runs out in front of me my knuckles go white and I attain a death grip on my handle bars as I await its partner that is lurking in the trees ready to ram me.  If you’d like to share this fear with me, you can watch the video here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S2oymHHyV1M.

They should post signs that say, "bike stealing deer ahead"

By far, the scariest critter-related incident I had while training occurred one evening about 11:30PM on Bellaire.  I hadn’t gotten my workout in yet, so I headed out the door at 11PM for my run.  I donned my white top, white skirt, florescent/reflective orange visor, clip on visor light, pepper spray, and my flashing red light so as to be visible to any passing cars (critters were not on my mind).  Well, I have watched far too many episodes of Criminal Minds to be able to sanely venture into the dark by myself at such an hour.  I was on high alert as it was.  As I headed back toward my apartment, I noticed the beady eyes of a critter focused on me.  The critter was in the bike path I was running on and I didn’t want to run too far into the street.  I slowed up.  I slowed up more.  It was going to be a chicken fight and it looked like I was going to lose.  The critter stood its ground, so focused on me that it was perfectly frozen, awaiting my passing.  I began to run into the street, to keep my distance from the critter, and as I approached, to my sheer shock, I realized what it was.  A smashed beer can, with the light from my visor reflecting on it, making it appear to have eyes.

There is absolutely no point to this post.  I just thought I would humor you with some of the things that go through my mind as I’m training J

Beware the smashed beer can animals of the night!

Shiny Happy People

A lot of people say that everything happens for a reason.  I don’t know that I used to believe this, but with the choices I’ve made in the last five years, I am beginning to believe it more and more. 

In the end of 2006 I decided to move to Texas, which led me to joining the marathon team for Team In Training.  After being a participant and mentor I chose to take the step to becoming a coach.  Right before the start of a season our walk coach decided not to return to coaching.  There is a riff in Team In Training between the walkers and the runners, but in my mind everyone out there is doing the same distance for the same cause, it just may take some longer than others.  So, I stepped up and volunteered to be the walk coach.  It was quite possibly one of the most humbling things I have ever done.  If you think running a marathon is hard, try walking one!  The people I coached on the walk team were driven and passionate about the cause and I learned a great deal from their determination. 

In 2008 a friend of mine talked me into doing a triathlon.  I tried to get out of it for the longest time by using the excuse that I didn’t have a bike, but I really (REALLY, REALLY, REALLY) hate being bad at things and I didn’t think I could swim very well, that was my true deterrent.  Another friend showed up with a mountain bike and my excuses were gone.  I did my first sprint in the end of 2008 in Cleburne.  Now, I am slightly competitive and was told (threatened, in my mind) by Fred Wood that “I would be the one he would beat”.  He’d found out it was my first tri and had set his mind on beating me as his goal.  Nope.  No, sir, was I going to let that happen.  Carlo (who is the one that got me into this whole mess) tracked my time and how far I was behind Fred the entire race.  It was one of the most adrenaline filled few hours of my life! 

Here are a few things that happened during that race:

-          I sat down in transition. Yup.  I popped a squat right there by my bike and took my sweet time putting bandaids on (I had really bad blisters). 
-          I didn’t have a cycle computer and I’m pretty sure that only mile 11 was marked on the bike.  I remember the scenery being really pretty, but I had NO IDEA how far I had gone or how far I had left.
-          I ran my heart out.  The fastest 5K I’ve ever run was at this race.  Raw adrenaline and the pure lack of any sort of knowledge of what I was doing led to this.

The point being, I fell in love with triathlon at this point.  The next year I ran the ultra at El Scorcho and decided that there was no logical reason to run 20 miles on Saturday followed by a 10 mile “recovery” (really, 10 mile recovery run???) on Sunday.  In the end of 2009 my focus became triathlon.

Somehow, over the next few years, I progressed from walk coach to run coach to triathlon coach.  Team In Training is an amazing organization and the passion of the people involved in it are what makes it so enjoyable to be a part of.  Coaching for Team In Training keeps me grounded and reminded of the hard work and dedication it took me to get where I am today.  The thirst for learning and growing that the participants have is addicting and entices me to coach them to the best of my ability so they reach (and exceed) their goals.

Sometimes you can get so caught up in where you are that you forget how you got there.

Coaching reminds me that when I started, I couldn’t swim from one end of the pool to the other without hyperventilating and feeling like my lungs were going to explode.  That I didn’t know how to get my tire off to change it, quick release anyone?  Gears…I bought my first road bike off of Craigslist (picked it up in a dark parking lot late at night…thanks for going with me Mer).  I proceeded to take it for its maiden ride as my new bike, then I proceeded to shift it all the way into the hardest gear.  Then it stopped shifting.  The darn thing was broken!!!  I took it to my friend, Don Armstrong, who kindly explained (I’m sure he was laughing a little), that the brake levers were shifters too. ..so, I guess it wasn’t broken.  Clipless pedals.  Oh the stories.  Slow motion falling and being able to do nothing about it…

I had my Team In Training participants take part in the Disco Sprint Triathlon this past weekend.  They have been training for over two months now and I wanted to get them into a race setting.  For some this was their first triathlon, ever.  For some it was their first in years.  For all of them, it was the beginning of the next phase of their training for either an Olympic or Half Ironman.  Sunday morning was a bit quiet.  I kept trying to find some of my TNT kiddos and they seemed to have wandered off.  Many of them were withdrawn and some were outwardly nervous.  Few were very smiley.

Come the finish line and each and every one of them finished with a smile on their face and each and every one of them cheered and got excited as the others crossed the finish line.  I am so proud of all of them!  The smiles on their faces when they finished are engrained in my mind.  They were like gossipy school kids when they finished, asking each other how they did and how they felt.  One of my guys told me he swam the entire distance without stopping.  This was HUGE for him.  HUGE!  Again, it grounds me to see the pure joy that can come from someone completing the entire swim of a sprint distance race.  Another one of my participants knocked 19 minutes off of her previous time at Disco.  19 MINUTES!  She was bouncing around with a Cheshire Cat smile on her face.  The best part to me?  That they were sharing this excitement with their Teammates.    

As much as I would like to attribute part of their success on Sunday to my tutu and Monica’s afro wig and sunglasses, I think it had to do a lot more with hard work on their part.  That day I was thanked time and time again (and so was Monica who is ROCKING as an assistant coach this season!) for getting them to the point they were at that day.  It made me so proud of them and proud to know that I could bring that much joy to someone just by coaching them.  I’m only part of the equation though.  My TNT kiddos have put in a ton of hard work this season and I can’t wait to see them all complete their events.  I know there is a long way to go and a lot of nerves, but they are more prepared than they realize.  When their big day comes they’ll have smiles on their faces for weeks to follow.

About two years ago I figured out what I wanted to be when I grow up.  It took me two years to fully realize it and take the leap.  I’ve made significant changes in my life this year.  The next couple of years aren’t going to be easy, but with hard work and support of some amazing friends, I know I’ll reach my dream. 

Bag o' Tricks

If you are a triathlete you have received (or bought) enough bags during your tri-life to send a family of five on a two week ski vacation, so why don’t you put one of those bags to good use on a daily basis?

Have you ever packed for your after work ride, run or swim only to get to the trails and realize, crap, you’ve forgotten your socks, visor, sunglasses, goggles or (ladies) your sports bra.  What oh what do you do?  Tell your training buddies you’re heading out for a beer and you’ll see them there after they finish their training?  I don’t think so. 

I used to belong do the Downtown YMCA.  I headed over for a lunchtime run one day only to realize I’d left my sports bra at home.  I had no time after work to get my run in, so it was now or never…what to do, what to do.  I stared at my locker for a bit and then pulled out my swimsuit.  I’ve seen plenty of women doing entire triathlons in swimsuits and never could figure out how it would be very comfortable.  So, I figured on this day of my forgetfulness, I might as well try something new in order to get my workout in.  I threw on my bathing suit, running shorts and a shirt and headed to the treadmill.  It was a HOT run, bathing suit material DOES NOT BREATH!  But I got my workout in.  If I hadn’t had that extra suit in my locker, I may not have gotten my workout in, which wouldn’t have made me very happy.

Yes, as a child, I was a Girl Scout and I still live by the motto “be prepared”.  I keep a bag in my car that I call my “bag o’ tricks”.  If I head out for a workout and realize I’ve forgotten something, my bag has a backup for almost everything I need in it.

Here are my contents:

-          Swimsuit

-          Swim Cap

-          Goggles

-          Contacts

-          Running shorts

-          Running shirt

-          Sports bra

-          Socks

-          Visor

-          Gym towel (can be used as a mini swim towel)

-          Jacket (winter)

-          Gloves (winter)

-          Ear warmer (winter)

-          Two produce bags (winter)…what are these for, you ask?  Ever forget your toe covers while riding in the winter?  Wrap a produce bag in the toes of your shoes and it helps a little.

Now I don’t have an old pair of bike shorts in there or running or cycle shoes, so if I forget certain things then I’m out of luck (I do carry about four pairs of sunglasses with me at all times, so I should never be short on those!), but I can pretty much pull off a workout with what’s in the bag if I have to.  I’d suggest adding things like body glide and Chapstick, but for those of us who live in hot climates it wouldn’t last a day without melting all over your extra gear.

Speaking of extreme summer heat…I have an extra helmet in the car too.  It’s one that came to its demise one hot summer day a couple years ago when I thought it was a good idea to leave it in the car (in direct sunlight) all day.  The case is melted, but it’s been used by multiple people when they’ve forgotten their helmet.  It’s a million times better than nothing!

As it turns out, I’ve used this bag more to loan things to people than for myself, but it has come in handy for myself every once in awhile.  Go through your plethora of bags and grab some old training gear that you don’t use often (don’t lie to yourself, each of us could probably put three of these bags together with all the extra gear we have) and create your own “bag o’ tricks”.  It will save your butt one day, or make you a hero to a training buddy that has forgotten their oh-so-important goggles.

Race Day Life Support

Could you do a triathlon swim without goggles?  Sure, but it would be very uncomfortable and heaven forbid you wear contacts or you might come into T1 blind.  How about completing the ride in a long course race in tennis shoes, now that you have fancy shmancy clipless pedals and shoes?  Yep, but you’d lose a lot of power.  How about doing the run in the blazing heat of at Texas summer without your hat/visor or sunglasses?  Of course!  But you’d get such a headache that you’d want to quit far before you reached the finish line.

So how much thought have you put into the importance of volunteers on race day?  Are they as vital as your goggles, bike shoes, or sunglasses?  As triathletes we focus on every aspect of the sport that can shave a nanosecond here and a millisecond there.  Do you ever factor the importance of volunteers into this?  They’re all relevant and necessary to a successful race day.

Don’t feel bad if I’ve left your favorite volunteer task off, I promised to try and keep these things short and I’m really trying my best to do so. 

Wetsuit strippers – aside from the fact that these poor rookie volunteers have no clue that they’re getting more than just water thrown on them each time they strip a wetsuit, these folks save you time.  Have you tried to get out of a wetsuit on your own?  I have, it sucks.  You step on it, you pull it, you sit down (WHAT???  Who would sit in transition, certainly not anyone that knows what they’re doing), you turn in circles, like a dog or cat trying to get comfortable before they lie down, then you just stop, take a deep breath and reassess the situation.  THEN, then that is when you finally get your wetsuit off.   I tried a new wetsuit on once when I was home alone and learned NEVER to do that again.  By the time I got it on I was sweating so much the darn thing had suctioned itself to my body.  I went from door to door (in a skin tight black suit in the dark) trying to find a neighbor to answer their door and help me out of the neoprene death grip.  No one answered.  Odd.  Point is, wetsuit strippers save you time.  I had a guy run all the way up to T1 with me at a race one time because the zipper on my wetsuit was stuck.  I was ready to go it alone, but he kept yelling (encouraging may be a better word) me to keep running while he tried to get the zipper undone.  It takes no time, while they’re handing you your wetsuit, to thank them.  So, thank them.

Bottle hand-up volunteers – You know those long rides we do?  The rides where we have to factor in where the convenience stores are so we can stop and get more water because we’re riding for five hours and there’s just no way (even with my rigging up every water bottle possible and, yes, a camel back) to carry enough water.   You know how your legs get stiff every time you stop?  How you lose your pace and rhythm?  Imagine doing that every 10 miles on the bike course.  Having to stop and get off your bike and refill.  O.M.G.  Who can even imagine having to do THAT?  That would drop your pace down a good ½mph or more.  And that, that is a lot of time in a race.  So when you eye your bottle hand-up volunteer, point to them and as you grab your bottle say a simple “thank you.”  Again, this adds zero time to your race, BUT they’ve just saved you time.

Sunscreen application volunteers – I find that these folks are few and far between, especially at the races that I need them most at (ahem, Galveston).  They seem to come out later in the race, but for those of us of German and English descent, whose skin leans towards the English side and being TOTALLY pale and were in an earlier wave they are often hard to come by.  When they are available and drowning your skin with a thick coat of a white pore choking substance, remember that they are saving you time from applying your own sunscreen.  Ever try to use spray sunscreen (so your hands don’t slip on the bike) after swimming?  How well does that stick to wet skin?  They are also saving you time in the form of doctor’s appointments and cancer treatments for skin cancer.  So, thank them.

Water Stop Volunteers – These volunteers are lifesavers.  Imagine having to carry enough hydration to get you through your race.  You know how heavy that would be?  I have learned, through being yelled at as a volunteer, to thank these folks.  I volunteered at El Scorcho once and was handing out what I was told was Gatorade.  As a woman came around for another lap, I called out “Gatorade” and handed her a cup.  She took a swig, spit it out, threw the cup down, and turned around screaming at me “that is not Gatorade!!!!!!!!!!!!!”  It made me never want to volunteer again.  She was scary!  Now, when I volunteer, I simply say “sports drink”, I figure that’s safer.  These folks  are your key to successful race.  I had a great volunteer experience once when I was wanting water at a race.  I ran through the stop yelling “water” and there wasn’t any ready.  As I passed the stop,  mouth parched but  not wanting the sweet nectar of a sticky sports drink, I heard the pitter-patter of feet behind me and a small voice saying “ma’am, ma’am”.  One of the volunteers was running after me with a cup of water.  That made my race!  Thank these volunteers.  Even if you can’t get the words out while you’re throwing down a cup of sports drink and drenching your head with a cup of water, a simple wave will do the trick.

Police Officers/Traffic Control – I don’t think I need to go into detail here why these volunteers are so vitally important.  Not only do they allow you to continue through congested intersections without stopping, they also protect your lives.  I thank every one of them.  Even on a loop course, where I see them more than once, I do my best to thank them every time.  Now, they are getting paid to be out there, but it can’t be an easy job in the middle of the Texas summer.  So thank them. 

Ironman Changing tent volunteers – WOW.  That is all I can really say.  For those of you who have yet to do an Ironman, you will experience some of the most amazing volunteers in the changing tent.  In Coeur d’Alene, I stood in the women’s changing tent with my sports bra pulled over my head and only about halfway on.  For any woman that has tried to put a sports bra on while wet or any guy who has tried to put on a tri top while dripping with lake water, you know it’s not an easy feat.  I grabbed the arm of the volunteer and just said, “will you please help me?”  Now, I am not good at asking for help, but I knew I wasn’t going to make it out of the tent in the manner of “dress” that I was currently in, so I needed help.  She stopped what she was doing and took my bag from me.  As she started pulling things out she would say, “Is it an arm warmer day?  Is it a gloves day?  Etc.”  I would have liked to think at the age of 29 I was totally capable of dressing myself.  But in this situation, maybe it was my half frozen fingers from the frigid lake water, the help was overwhelming.  I must have thanked her every time she helped me put something on (she truly dressed me, I don’t think I even put my own socks on).  These volunteers are fabulous and without her, I would probably have been in the changing tent for at least another 5 minutes.

If you have never volunteered for an event, even a local 5K, go do it.  Take a morning off training and go volunteer.  You will be amazed at the appreciation you receive and how great it is to volunteer at an event and help others do what you love to do.  Take yourself out of being the one that needs to be supported and support others.  It will bring to light just how amazing the volunteers are that make every one of your races possible for you.

The Greatest Danger

I was not happy with this blog for awhile.  In fact, I have four more started that stemmed from my ramblings in the below and yet it is still so long (really, really long).  It's a good read though :)   

About a year ago Stacy Martinez posted a quote on Facebook.  Now, I do admit I am a sucker for quotes and there are some very inspirational quotes out there.  Every once in awhile I’ll post one, but I’m not a quote addict and as motivating as they are, in this great age of Social Media, they can be overdone.  There is also the great advice of Abraham Lincoln.

Stacy posted a quote by Michelangelo, “The greatest danger for most of us is not that our aim is too high and we miss it, but that it is too low and we reach it.”  WHO DOESN’T LOVE THIS????????  It is so true! 

Something clicked for me when I read that quote.  I fell in love with it.  I read it over and over.  I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE IT!!!  I subsequently found a custom jeweler and had a leather bracelet made for myself and for Stacy.  I wear that bracelet every day and she wears it every time she races.  Reading that quote was a breaking point for me and every morning when I get up and put on my bracelet, I read it.  That’s a lie, I have it memorized now, so I just say it.

We are programmed at a young age that failure is bad and that not achieving the goal we set out to concur is failure.  Another great quote (caveat, do not really take this seriously), “If you ain't first, you’re last” (Reese Bobby).  What do we spend most of our lives doing?  Trying not to fail.  Many times we don’t focus on trying to succeed because of the fear of failure.  Our focus ends up being NOT failing. 

We are taught to set goals for ourselves that are measurable and attainable.  But how do we know what is attainable, what is truly within our reach?  How do we know how far we can push ourselves and how much our body truly has to give?  We set those goals off of what we know our body can achieve from past occurrences.  Then we add just a bit and that becomes our new goal.

 If you are reading this and you’re an endurance athlete, you know what I’m talking about.  If you’ve ever been a spectator at an endurance event, you know what I’m talking about.  You’ve been there.  You’ve experienced it or you’ve witnessed it and afterwards you’ve asked “how did I/they do that?”   

I got my start in this new universe of endurance athletics because a college roommate of mine, Susie Sanderson, talked me into training for a marathon.  We were chatting on the phone (she was living in Virginia and I in Texas) and she said “let’s train for a marathon and then meet up somewhere to run it!”  My response, “Sure!  That sounds so great!!!”  After I hung up the phone I realized I hated running.  The longest run I had ever done was during high school as punishment for our soccer team...I don’t remember how far we ran (or even what we had done wrong), but it.was.soooooo.far.  Thank you Paul Rogers and Jason Hill for that.  So I started my training.  How in the heck was I going to run 26.2 miles???  I had never done anything close to this.  After a bit I worked my way up to 5 miles and at that point I figured there was no turning back…Don’t ask me why this mental break through came at the 5 mile mark.

A few years ago, I set a huge goal for myself.  I wanted to qualify for the Boston Marathon.  This meant I had to knock 24 minutes off of my Personal Record (PR).  My best marathon time had been 4:04.  I had to run a 3:40 (or under) to qualify for Boston.  I was told, by someone, whose opinion in running I highly valued, that I couldn’t do it (not in those exact words, but there was no confidence any time I spoke with them).  I went ahead and set that goal for myself anyway.  Not only did I set that goal, I verbally told people about it.  I was scared to death.  What if I didn’t do it?  What if I reached high and missed?  It would be so much easier to just have a goal of running under 4 hours.  That only meant taking 5 minutes off my time.  That was much more doable, right? 

Rock 'n Roll San Antonio (2009)

I ran my heart out that marathon and successfully completed it thanks to Carlo Capua who ran me in the last 4 or so miles, and kept running with me, even when I stopped acknowledging he was there, even after he said he was going to let me run the rest of the way in on my own.  I think he told me this four times, but stayed by my side because he knew I just needed someone there. 
I missed Boston.  I missed Boston by 4 seconds.  Yes, you read that right, 4 seconds.  If you just teared up there it is ok, I tear up every time I think about it.  They say golf is a game of inches and I say Boston is a game of seconds.  4 seconds to me.  Everyone I trained with knew what my goal was and when they heard I didn’t make it they were upset for me.  They told me to petition my time, after all I was so close.  I appreciate their support and I feel the same way for each of them when they don’t quite achieve their goals.  But I wanted to earn Boston and I flat out didn’t.  I was close, but a lot of people are close.  Boston is elusive.  Boston, in my mind, must be earned, fair and square.  You know what I did that race though?  That no one, but me, focused on?  I PRd by a ton.  I knocked 23 minutes off of my previous best time.  23 minutes!!!   That is huge.  That day, in San Antonio, I failed at achieving my goal.  I aimed high and I missed it.  But, I will go back and will take my 4 seconds back.  And I will earn Boston.  


Fast forward two years and a new friend posted a quote by Michelangelo.  A quote that allowed me to believe that I could qualify for the 70.3 World Championships, even when I was told by someone close to me that I didn’t deserve it.  I am sensing some sort of pattern here.  This person later told me they thought this would motivate me, but two weeks before my qualifying race nothing more training-wise could be done.  If I didn’t deserve it at that point, nothing I could do in two weeks would allow me to deserve it.  I am, apparently, not good at listening to people sometimes.  This was one of those times.  Their comment frustrated me, it royally pissed me off.  I had been working damn hard to be where I was.  So I let it go.

Repeating Michelangelo’s quote during Branson 70.3 is what made me jump off my bike and run it in the last mile to T2.  I had a flat, it wasn’t just a random decision I made and thanks to Chris Wright there is a pretty hilarious video of me pitter-pattering my way into T2 in wet socks, which are forever stained.  I have failed at achieving my goals before (oops, did I just admit that…) and I’m still around.  If I didn’t push myself past those measurable and attainable goals, those goals that are a bit beyond what we HAVE done, but just far enough past that to be considered a new goal, a new accomplishment, how would I know what I could really do? 

My confidence collapsed when I flatted, my heart dropped.  I literally had a sinking feeling, Worlds was gone.  But I couldn’t let a little deflated air get in the way of a dream.  Two seconds later my shoes were off and I was flying at the speed of light (might be a slight over exaggeration here, but there was A LOT of adrenaline at this point) with my bike towards T2.  I was choking back tears, I still thought my chance at qualifying was gone.  The kindness of my training buddy Jack Ogle who turned around (yes, turned around and came back) on the bike course, at one of the toughest bike-legs of a triathlon I have ever done, lifted my spirits, got me to T2 and off on the run. 

The suspense at roll down was nearly as hard on my heart as the 70.3 miles I had completed earlier in the day had been on my body.  Heather stayed with me as they begin calling names in my age group.  There were two slots, 1^st and 2^nd place had not accepted them.  I placed 7^th.  That meant at least three of the next four people had to decline.  When they called my name I jumped up, like I little kid (reference my previous blog about Christmas…it was somewhat similar to this).  I can’t remember the last time I was excited like that.  I had qualified for WORLDS!

All this rambling really just leads to one point.  Go for it.  You may (ok “may” is being nice), the odds are in your favor that if you go for it, you will fail on your way to succeeding.  But is it truly failure?  Or have you just not quite reached success yet?  The “failures” will hurt, they may hurt bad.  But they will build you up and when you achieve your goal, and you will with hard work, the emotions will far trump anything you have ever felt when you didn’t quite make it. 

 I have a blue sticky note stuck to my bathroom mirror. It has four things written on it in pink Sharpee (the color of the sticky note and marker are totally irrelevant): 

Earn Worlds ~ Nationals ~ Boston ~ Kona

Remember that the greatest danger for most of us is not that our aim is too high and we miss it, but that it is too low and we reach it.  Aim high kids.  The rewards are far beyond anything that can be described in words.  

Swim Start Area at Kona...someday :)

An Iron Christmas

I used to love that feeling you got as a little kid on Christmas morning.  We don’t get it much anymore as adults.  The excitement and the anticipation.  The pure joy of the new shiny thing that you’ve asked Santa to bring you, that you’ve wanted for months.  It may be because, as adults, we are now paying for that new shiny thing and we know how much hard work goes into acquiring it and as we get older our new shiny wishes tend to cost more and more, but I digress.

My family always went up to Truckee (just outside of Tahoe) for Christmas and my cousin and I would wake up early and go upstairs to see what Santa had brought us.  A lot of mornings it would still be dark outside and I remember the upstairs just glowing from the lights and the tinsel on the tree.  It looked like one of those cheesy 80’s profile portraits that was all faded and glimmery, but in my mind was beautiful.  We’d walk around the Christmas tree looking at tags, seeing what was for each of us.  The intricate and creative wrapping would intrigue us and sometimes we’d beg to open one gift before breakfast.  We would get so giddy and excited.  And the anticipation for the entire week leading up to Christmas, oh my, there are no words.

Last Friday I got giddy and excited and I felt like I had when I was a kid on Christmas morning and the week or so leading up to it.  I had met a woman at the USA Triathlon Coaching Certification class who had done Ironman UK.  For a few months now I’ve been trying to pick my 2013 Ironman event.  I was focused on Ironman Lake Placid, but a group of my Trident buddies were headed back to Ironman Coeur d’Alene.  I wanted to do a new course, but I knew training without the support of the CdA 12 would be a whole different experience.  And quite honestly, I wasn’t ready to do another Ironman without them.  CdA was my first Ironman and it was amazing.  I didn’t break in land speed records, but I finished with a smile and so proud of what I’d achieved, what we’d all achieved.

I have never run a marathon with a group of people and seen them all smiling at the finish line.  There are always “bite me” moments and sheer glares of death, where you say something to someone who is at the “bite me” stage and you feel like you must evade their stare or you may never speak again, EVER…that didn’t happen in CdA.  Everyone was so supportive of each other and just happy the whole day.  I honestly can’t even put into words how amazing my entire training experience and my Ironday was.  I wanted another one of those days, but nothing had truly struck me yet like the anticipation of doing CdA had.

I’d been looking at doing Lake Placid and then got Ironman UK on my mind.  The English countryside is absolutely gorgeous and yes, the scenery is a top priority in my Ironman picks.  If I’m going to be out there doing something for as long as it takes me to do and Ironman, it damn well better be fricken gorgeous. 

On the morning of June 15, 2012 (note, that I’m adding some suspense in here) I texted my training buddy Jack Ogle and said, “I want to do IM England at some point”.  This statement was ignored.  Four hours later I got a text back from Jack.  It simply said “Tahoe!”  To which I replied.  “WHAT?  Are they doing one???”  And the saga begins…

I nearly yanked Carlo’s arm off, who was sitting next to me at the time, and later said he’d never seen me so excited for anything, EVER.  I don’t know how many text messages were exchanged within the next few hours, but that feeling came back.  I got so excited.  THIS was the next Ironman for me.  I texted Steve “Papi” Holstein, who was by far my biggest mental asset at IM CdA.  Our text conversation went as follows:

-          Me (2:51PM):  IM in Tahoe!!!
-          Papi (2:52PM):   Sweet!  We’re at Disney World
-          (UGH) I will let you all chuckle for a minute here and recover before I continue with our texts.
-          Papi (2:52PM):  I saw there is going to be a full IM in Tahoe!
-          Me (2:53PM): That is what I just told you!!!

I do admit that my initial text was not clear.

Ironman Lake Tahoe was announced on a Friday afternoon.  Registration began the following Monday afternoon.  It was all any of us were talking about all weekend.  Every time I saw someone who was planning to sign up I’d just yell “TAHOE!”  As Ironman is becoming more popular, events are selling out much faster.  Many of us anticipated an immediate sell out of Tahoe.  So I set a reminder on  my phone to alert me a few minutes before  registration was opening and I checked the site 27 times throughout the morning until the registration link was up (not live yet, just VISIBLE). 

Monday I began getting texts from people.  A select few are below…

-          “Is it time yet???”
-          “I’m so nervous.  How much is it?”
-          “I’m tired of waiting!!”
-          “I need to have my husband have our baby!” (yes, those plans were put on hold for IM Lake Tahoe)
-           “I had a dream that I was going to Active.com on the computer to get things ready for sign up and all of the keys had been pulled of my computer!!!”

As the clock approached 2PM Central…
-          “U ready??”
-          “Now!”
-          “GO, GO, GO!”

And after registration opened, the texts continued to flow…

-          “I’m In!!!” (there were A LOT of those)
-          “That puppy is pricy”
-          “$708.75!”  (My response, “we are stupid”) And yes, for those of you that are wondering, that is how much we paid
-          “Wowza!!”
-          “This is your fault you know” (Don’t worry, they’ll thank me later)
-          “Wow, who did not sign up for Tahoe?  I want to be a Sherpa”
-          “Looks like I’ll be purchasing a gas mask in the near future” (We’re gonna have to figure out the whole altitude training)

So, to the 25+ (for those of you who haven’t plastered Facebook with this new feat you are going to tackle), here is to over a year of hard work, surprises, fits, excitements, frustrations, joy, laughs, and stories.  Steve, Jack, Tamara, Heather, Chuck, Troy, Christa, Will, Etter, Jason, Michael, Kulka, Jen, Angela, Kelly, Misty, Myrna, Brian, Alison, Missy, Russell, Kimberly, Cathy, and Rich - I am so excited to share my second Ironday with such amazing people and can’t wait for Christmas next year, which for many of us, will fall on September 22^nd.